RuPaul's Queens Are Working to Make Christmas a Complete Drag This Year!

   It's beginning to feel a lot like a shady ass Christmas. Even though it's the middle of November, the turkey hasn't even been stuffed yet, we've already been blessed with RuPaul's joyous Slay Belles, the queen's first collection of original Christmas music since 1997. Damn, we old? But just when you thought it was safe to go outside... BAM!, an assortment of fierce and fabulous RuPaul's Drag Race contestants from seasons past recently dropped Christmas Queens, a 16-track effort guaranteed to pop any tuck with pure delight. 

   Christmas brings even the worst of friends together as sworn enemies Sharon Needles and Phi Phi O'Hara share top billing with the former DWV members Willam and Detox. Manila Luzon, Alaska Thunderfuck, Jinkx Monsoon, Katya and Miss Fame also lend their vocals to the exciting, holiday project, which could be the perfect stocking stuffer for crazed Drag Race fans around the world or the annoying few who love to blast "Frosty the Snowman" in early October. 

   After the 16 queens come together for album opener "We Wish You A Merry Christmas", they are all on their own as they try to spread cheer to listeners, getting in a few laughs along the way. But which original track came out of top? Let's narrow it down, shall we? 

   Following successful collaborations with Willam and Courtney Act, aka the AAA Girls, Alaska Thunderfuck released her honest and hilarious Anus to critical acclaim before donning her red beret and brown boots. For her Christmas Queens addition, "Everyday Is Christmas" is a traditional, joyful and sentimental ode to the birth of Christ, but towards the end, the queen implements her trademark ad libs, explaining why even on Martin Luther King Jr. Day and Election Day, it's still Christmas in her eyes. For an added laugh or two, be sure to watch Alaska's accompanying music video for "Everyday Is Christmas". Glamour for any time of the year.

   Season seven runner-up Ginger Minj may have lost the crown to Violet Chachki, but her "Christma-Hannu-Kwanzaa-Ka" is a bright highlight for the new Christmas project. We all think we know everything about every single holiday, or we at least try and act like we do. In her impressive low vocal delivery, Minj recites Wikipedia page entries on Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa with brilliant end results. While referring to herself as a troll under a bridge and incorporating her winning Divine Inspiration challenge catchphrase, the song becomes a catchy, hysterical listen that could soon become an instant classic.

   In her best demonic, British, Joan Rivers-like impersonation, season four winner Sharon Needles gives “Jingle Bells” an unexpected, genius, punk/rock edge. With hard-hitting instrumentals and Needles’ love or hate, unapologetic attitude, the Christmas carol becomes a loud and crass contribution that your parents would definitely not approve of. Somehow, the new rendition sounds exactly like a “Halloween on Christmas” type of effort would, perfect for the artist’s trademark laugh and dark soul. While the track may not be the Drag Race affair many would gravitate to, it's nice to hear Needles stick to her artistic direction. 

   Finally, we get a dance beat-driven Christmas song. How many of those are out there? Detox details an awkward dinner at the boyfriend's house on "This Is How We Jew It". Slightly reminiscent of a LMFAO/The Chainsmokers-hybrid, the song has some of the best one-liners on the entire album. Besides being the anthem for the holiday after party with the co-workers, Detox is able to bring her trademark, inappropriate, spoken word style to an effortlessly funny song. One the drag entertainer gets passed all the dill pickles and Challah bread, she comes to embrace the Jewish traditions once gold coins and Manischewitz are handed out. Shalom! 

   Previewed before the release of the album, the AAA Girls come together once again on "Christmas Sweater", where Alaska, Courtney and Willam detail exactly how Christmas plays out in their household. With a 90s-like, guitar-driven beat, Willam highlights the dysfunction during the holidays, Courtney uses the plot of Home Alone to describe her Christmas troubles, and Alaska reminisces on never getting the gifts she really wanted. It's all pieced together with a radio-ready chorus and a throwback to the AAA Girls' previous Christmas offering. Everything the three queens have released has been comedy gold, this album cut is no different. 

   In addition, "Toyland" by Miss Fame", "From Head to Mistletoe" by Courtney Act and "Red & Green" by Jinkx Monsoon continue to showcase impressive vocal abilities from Drag Race contestants on could-be winter hits. The songwriting on Jiggly Caliente's "Ratchet Christmas" is solid, but the monotone delivery doesn't sell the material. Willam's solo "A Very Cozby Christmas" does not live up to her past gems, maybe it was the lousy Cosby impression. And while efforts from Mnaila Luzon, Katya and Phi Phi O'Hara are decent, they didn't quite stand out enough. What are your thought on the new Christmas Queens album? Sound off!